ellamine

ellamine t1_j6ov35w wrote

I haven’t seen this mentioned yet but it seems to me like your gf has some serious stuff going on (self hate, guilt, etc)

She seems to be intentionally escalating her poor behaviors in order to be punished, which is not safe or fair to you. She will eventually do something irreversibly damaging if nothing changes.

She is also using you as a form of self harm. If she truely believes that she deserves punishment for this stuff, then she has something serious going on, and you can make things worse by reinforcing this thought pattern of hers. So NO MORE bdsm play until she gets some therapy, she proves that she isn’t going to intentionally sabotage things anymore, and you both read up on basic bdsm protocols and safe words.

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