genuinely_insincere t1_jd1ogsy wrote

I recently saw a TED talk about that! And it really changed how I deal with negative people. Or difficult people. Like Trump types who refused to see logic. Because, apparently humans tend to have a hard time letting go of negative facts. So, you might think that curly hair looks good on somebody. So you like Curly hair. But then you meet somebody who has curly hair who treats you like shit. Now you don't like people with curly hair. And then it takes a lot more for you to let go of that negative idea. Whereas it just took one negative instance to get rid of the positive idea.

So I'll get really frustrated when I talk to negative people because they refuse to let go even when I'm showing them facts, and even when I open up to them emotionally and heal their emotional wounds with them. They'll still refuse to let go of the negative point.

So it's become really frustrating for me. But I guess if it's true that people have a hard time letting go of negativity, it kind of makes it easier for me to just let go of them. And let them work through things in their own time.


genuinely_insincere t1_jd1o4m6 wrote

It's just so unsettling to see someone say that negativity is more real than positivity.

So, let's say Your mother hates you and despises you. What do you think that would do to you? You would probably have a very tough time with life. You would encounter a lot of problems simply from that one thing.

But then let's say Your mother loves you and adores you. Now you're going to be healthier and stronger. You're going to have an easier time in life. You're going to feel better.

Negativity is not more real than positivity.

I know that wasn't your main point, but I kind of picked up on that even before you stated that. Like I could tell that you were thinking along those lines.


genuinely_insincere t1_jd1l1s4 wrote

Interesting concept! Yeah that does kind of sound similar or like it might be that.

Yeah actually, I think that does fit that term. It's sort of like the opposite of a paradox.


genuinely_insincere t1_jd1kq29 wrote

Well, it just makes no sense otherwise. You start off saying that they're both correct. But did somebody say that neither were correct? It seems like you put that forward unprovoked. So, it seems like you're trying to get two opposing sides to agree by simply saying that they're both right.


genuinely_insincere t1_jcl8sc1 wrote

I think you might be in denial a little bit. Optimism is about overcoming those negative feelings. Pessimism is about falling to those negative feelings. And perpetuating them. An optimist has those negative feelings and addresses them in a healthy way. A pessimist refuses to let go of them.

But I don't mean to be disrespectful or to disregard what you said. Because I think it's an interesting perspective


genuinely_insincere t1_jcl8gqd wrote

Yep, unlikable even to yourself. A lot of people were raised wrong or misguided and don't realize that they are able to like themselves. Or they feel blocked from admitting that point. So they refuse to get help when people offer it. Like, for instance, someone with depression is told that they have to snap out of it. And then you'll see people saying that it's terrible advice and it's not helpful. But that's the only solution. Snap out of it.


genuinely_insincere t1_jcl83bb wrote

Yep. This subreddit is very negative. It's a lot of nihilists and pessimists who refuse to acknowledge that a tree is always growing. And I do despise them for that. Although I am working on letting go of blame. Because it just makes life easier if you don't blame people.


genuinely_insincere t1_j8vd9cj wrote

For some reason people are really defensive against my comment here

Honestly this subreddit is kind of garbage. I don't know why. It's like, on every post there's a million people arguing against it. Like why did they join or subscribe to a get motivated subreddit if they're going to argue against every post that's about motivation?

I guess I'm being rude but they're kind of asking for it


genuinely_insincere t1_j8vc5ew wrote

And he also invented mbti or what eventually became mbti. Which is a flawed personality theory.

But I would say that's similar to how boomers are with technology. Some of them invented computers. And now you have gen Z who are able to probably develop new forms of Technology based on computers.

So nowadays we are constantly learning new things about our brains and our minds. And Carl Jung was one of the first to start looking at that.

I'm not saying he's an infallible genius I was just kind of joking on that guy because they said this isn't a deep thought and it's like okay at what point is it a deep thought? He's the father of psychology I'm sure he's going to have some deep thoughts.


genuinely_insincere t1_j8n4j6v wrote

Yes. The past is the past. It's better to leave things in the past rather than let them continue to live in the present in your reality. Because what you're thinking about is what you are experiencing. So if you leave something in the past, that's where it will stay. You can't erase it from the past, but you can leave it there. And you can forget about things.


genuinely_insincere t1_j8n49dg wrote

Gossiping is only bad if it's actually done in earnest. Basically, it's shaming others. If you're just chit-chatting and you don't actually have negative feelings about other people, there's nothing really wrong with that. And we have to be able to talk to one another about life. Just because somebody is talking doesn't mean it's a bad thing. So gossiping is really only bad if you're just talking shit.