Death throes compel them to mimic andouille or boudin.

You're welcome. Ashley (brand, but not the furniture people, I don't think) still makes them to this day. They are NOT attractive at all, very function over form, but quite effective. Used properly, with a good hardwood, like seasoned red oak, they can heat an entire house and not burn through a ton of wood.

Exactly.

It's useful for piling stuff on top of during the off season.

I don't think ours was that heavy, but man did it give me an upper body workout. And talk about burning off some pent up ADHD energy...

They use a power splitter now. Goes a lot faster, still get to sit around and watch and talk shit, maybe have the occasional beer, but I miss the inevitable competitiveness the splitting parties used to have... that and my grandpa. I miss him too - he was always there, every time.

I remember mom and dad saving the black jack oak for night logs. That shit was too dense to split by hand, but would burn all night, low and slow.

I can remember trying to split oak logs by myself when I was like, 13, 14? Just for giggles. Talk about getting you in shape and giving you a cardio workout!

Some are side loaders, some have double doors in the front. This one is a side loader.

It's a grate/expanded metal for heat disbursement, so you don't melt your palm if you touch it.

I grew up with these, it is a wood stove. Look up Ashley Wood stoves - they are still made today, and just as ugly as they were in the 70s and 80s.

Sweet Jesus. It is a wood burning stove. Don't be a dick. You're wrong.

Man, they are indeed ugly. But holy shit they work.

You assume it's in use right now.

It has a box inside the box... cast iron? I think? Inside that it is lined with fire blocks. Has a grate in the floor of it so ashes can fall through to an ash pan, which slides out and you can dump your ashes outside or wherever. Cast iron door will have a fiber 'seal' that runs all the way around it.

Should have a 'damper' on it which controls the airflow. You open it wide open when starting a fire or you want the fire to kick up, dial it down almost all the way at night or enjoy sweating all night long.

Chimney gets cleaned regularly, just like with any wood stove or fireplace.

My mom dried our jeans on top of ours... so add some wet blue jeans too... Maybe some socks that got wet from playing in snow. Stick the wet boots and shoes under the front edge there....