OP, I don't want to claim to know exactly how you feel, but I have BPD and I know how intense those feelings can be. Most people will just never understand how something so innocuous can feel like a dagger in the heart, and it's true those deep reactions aren't the problem of others to solve, but for a 'loved' one to keep putting you last is just wrong.

Hard pass, he's showing he xan turn it on and off like a flashlight when his actions are going to affect her, and only her. He thinks that she'll just love him unconditionally, his actions be damned. No way, doesn't work that way. He's just being inconsiderate

42 wallaby way