phayke2

phayke2 t1_j9qxvsc wrote

Well hey, hope you enjoy your time in Chattanooga!

I recommend Main St Meats for amazing burgers, Niedlovs for great affordable breakfast or lunch, the cat cafe and scooter tours.

Also check out the pinball museum and soda shop next door, both by the aquarium

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phayke2 t1_j1h7fva wrote

It's like the flood from Halo, or like when a main character has some kind of special power but the more they use it the more it makes their arm look weird and infected and then they like hide it and don't tell anybody until it's like taking over their whole body

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phayke2 t1_iuf9esb wrote

I'll get to where I wanna be huh?

Well everybody my age who wanted to start a family of their own already has like 3 kids from other dudes who are half grown so this advice better kick in soon I'm getting too old and so are the single women my age. And that career better hurry too cause my joints, energy and social skills aren't what they used to be either. Oh and building a retirement, probably gotta hurry with that one. Oh and affording a house like my old classmates have by now. Better get on that one about 5-10 years ago. And knowing what a gang of tight friends is like, probably should go back in time to before they all started families cause that's a 20's thing

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phayke2 t1_itxtdh1 wrote

Make sure you have a therapist or case manager or somebody to help guide you cause having a lot of new energy all at once can be intense too. And it is easy to ruminate and think a lot going down weird trains of thought so I'd say it helps a lot finding someone who can help you add to your life and help you bring order to the mess one step at a time. Really anyone to just help you track your feelings and anchor you is a huge help.

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phayke2 t1_itw2z7x wrote

I mean a week after Wellbutrin kicking in and waking up with a start each morning I can understand how people manage to go to the gym or support themselves working two jobs or even have a routine or sustain hobbies. Like all the motivational quotes start to apply more when you have 2x the amount of baseline energy to start out with each day.

Edit: To add on to what I was saying in a more helpful way, in addition to added energy it helps with fixing your pre frontal cortex that is responsible for your motivation levels and how much everything feels like daunting bullshit. So all that 'motivation comes from within' stuff starts coming from within more.

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phayke2 t1_isicfry wrote

Yeah I guess I just need to blend in with people who I previously felt nothing in common with like some alien while they had healthy lives support and self esteem the past 20 years and I was wasting away turning cynical. Find a way to like the people who always seemed irritating before and have less dark sense of humor, cause apparently it's the hardest thing to find well adjusted friends who know both sides and are working on themselves. Either I'm in a depressed bubble or healthy people are too busy or find me weird or judge the shit out of me.

And yeah a lot of was depression but a lot of it is the long term effects, my ecosystem and my wiring from all those years. I don't know what to do with happiness or energy or know anyone who really gives much of a fuck now that I have the ingredients to live a better life I just feel alienated on both sides rather than one.

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phayke2 t1_ishzx6y wrote

My antidepressants kicked in and every person I know is like one or two levels above suicidal or ignoring me (and likely most everyone else they know too). Outgrowing my depression friends is lonelier than being depressed. I genuinely wish I was back to barely having the energy to get up, it would be less disappointing/alienating. My environment and level of energy and spirit would at least match. Now it's just the pills making me feel positive and everyone else making me feel not worth talking to.

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