These situations always suck, even if it happens with a mobile child.

When a traumatic event happens in front of you; your brain will continue to process it, in wierd ways sometimes.

It is possible that his shoulder also took some of the impact. Unless he made contact with anything else, such as the foot rest of his wheelchair; that would be my assumption. Simple physics.

Even if he hits the top of his head; there's going to be impact bruises on where the body took the hit too.

It is unfortunate that you were left alone with him in a vulnerable place. I will remind you that even swinging arms will cause some movement to the upper body. Place the body on a ledge and then momentum can take over.

I'm sorry that you have to go through this. It sounds like you do really care about the well being of this child and did the best you could.

You generally apply a ice pack or cold compress to bumps in order to minimize swelling. Rubbing is not recommended as that would definitely increase the blood flow to the bump.

Note: bumps and bruises are a normal part of childhood. The parents know that.

That's one hellva golden parachute!

Thanks for sharing! This makes me smile..

I think that most people have dealt with the same thoughts here and there...

I don't think that you necessarily need a therapist for the occasional intrusive, or disassociative thought. Unless there's other factors that are leading you to muse over such things.

Maybe an apology and some reassure is called for; after blindsiding her with that nugget of information.

Express how thankful you are to have a open minded relationship with her; that allows you to express these feelings. Without all of the bells and whistles being blown out.

I am sure that your mom would rather know; than not know. It is just a surprising admission and it probably shook her up, in the moment. It's a heavy subject to talk about; even if everyone is on the same page.

So don't be too hard on yourself or your Mother. These feelings will come and go through out your life. The time for help is when you don't have it come and go..