worming92 t1_ixqfwbd wrote

as a siren, it was my duty to sing and try and lure sailors to their death. i mean, that's how we sirens survive, right? what else can we eat if not human men? (or women, the fucklets that more often than not end up falling prey to us are men though)

one human male is enough to feed around 4 sirens, I've been leeching onto the kills of my family or friends. we normally start singing in groups, recently found out humans liked acapellas and choirs. anyway, that's besides the point. never in my whole siren career have i felt so humiliated.

it was just another one of those nights when you just wake up hungry for no reason, and all my friends are asleep. It'd be nice to give them a surprise breakfast with my leftovers, I pride myself on being rather charitable. so I swam out to sea in hopes of finding prey.

and here i was, perched on some random rock and sang my heart out. you know since the weather was getting a bit chilly i figured singing these poor sea-men a christmas song would be nice,

"I don't want a lot for christmas....." I sang, at the top of my lungs.

"holy shit the spirit of mariah carey is out here with us. or is it seasickness?" one guy said.

"dude what the actual fuck." another one said, "go back to sleep."

"there is just one thing i need," I continued, the dude rushed out to the deck.

"Yo who's singing," he yelled. looking out in my general direction- i think its working.

"I don't care about the presents.." I kept singing, the dude just stared blankly and then..threw himself into the sea. holy shit. it's that easy? "Underneath the christmas tre-"

"stop." I heard his voice. Didn't this bozo just drown or am I the one hallucinating the spirit of a vengeful soul? "You're so bad at singing." he continued, I looked down, and there he was- clinging onto the rock I was on.


"You sang it in E major... the original song is in G major," he said, "And I really appreciate you trying to get festive but I'm afraid this is the fucking southern hemisphere. We're in Australia, dipshit, it's July."


I just didn't know how to respond. This is the end of my career. I pushed the sailor away and swam as far as I could. Someone put me in fish glub glub-a-blub therapy or some shit because it's been 3 fucking years and this still comes back to haunt me.